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I -- my name welcome to career accelerator teen Sam Lawrence and then Eddie thank you for joining -- -- first topic today is something that any worker out there always wonders -- why.
Positive or any sort of confirmation are affirmation that we're doing a good job but if we're not -- that they job -- we want some constructive criticism of the problem is sometimes their bosses think that the -- -- is not paying attention.
-- -- For feedback to our career coach Caroline Cindy and I being joining us once again here -- -- You're also the co-founder of six figures start ended off there and you put together some great tips for getting -- -- getting even -- Right way.
So where should we start with this I -- had you -- off it which surprised me because.
-- -- -- Considered a little -- on the buses are well you wanna know how your boss likes to communicate and the frequency that feedback isn't a once a year thank you so you want to ask often enough that you're able -- -- Refining what you're doing -- do more of what's going -- -- -- -- ask and say you know how often do you like to me how do you like to meet tonight listening on the calendar.
Doing dropped by doing sending email status report it in -- You know frequent communications you can asking -- -- what went -- here what should -- be working.
A crack -- that that actually an excellent point is being straight out -- -- cannot.
-- back with you how do you want me do it and when you want me do it I'm making it easy and painless for you pray for your help.
Get in front of your -- you want to get that -- time highs.
You again you don't -- to the end of the year when there's really nothing that you can do about it I -- what do you think people fear asking for.
That feedback because maybe they just don't want to hear anything bad and they haven't heard anything let's just assume that it's good will remember that -- that isn't -- negatives that part of it is -- -- working on the right things.
Should I be doing more of a specific day and what went well here again -- that you can repeat that so.
-- -- -- -- -- -- -- You know being on the rock of the right track in just making sure they're playing to your strength and it doesn't have to be to just scary thing.
In a perfect world how many times a year -- one get you back.
C insured you definitely want at least once a year that you have that's at ten -- where -- had that annual review.
And the great if you can do it twice -- -- here again as he can course correct along the way.
-- you know why it ended present your job that you -- a project by project and certainly wanna do debrief about what happened there.
As your role changes as you adopt -- new things remember in the last few years people started taking on a lot of responsibility.
As departments are restructured and people started taking on second third jobs and -- your box might not even be a -- Arab all the things that you're doing.
And that that's an excellent point that often happens is still happening any company people -- let go for cost cutting reasons and their roles and never filled but.
Filled with everyone else who's working and we'll still like instead used to have this one clear rolling nanny took on a quarter of -- -- -- left the company and a quarter of the other person's Roland I was doing double duty on a daily basis and is there oversight.
Knowing that you are doing all of these things right and some of the things he picked up -- super important for the company.
Your boss is also twice as busy as before is that helpful.
For him hurts you know -- yeah he took -- -- that's great he really ran with it that's right and had no training and it may -- -- might not know you're doing it and and you don't know if you.
-- -- the right results right as a result that that's a good point I -- you do get that feedback and it might not be as.
Or you might not be as constructive as you hoped how do you react to that I'd imagine you don't want to get defensive on this one.
Right so I think it affected get curious printing -- -- getting more information as to why does this person think I get this this FX.
What was it.
That he did or us ahead -- -- you know what what happened exactly.
That makes the -- -- -- -- that -- and colleagues feel a certain way the -- this peaking yet.
The more information you have -- -- change it for the -- -- stopped doing whatever.
Did he can't get -- specifics you're trying your realizing that other party just hasn't really happened.
He may be Abbas turned from a colleague that you're just not good it's one thing today there were repeated that you -- can't back it up and he get defensive event.
You know he never -- -- it does not help you right.
Don't think I say be grateful ray just found her yet pointing that out right instead of while definitely look out for that in the future because -- well you look out for that.
We'll -- people tweak it and go from there.
Each weekend and then had you asked for -- again.
Well I actually -- it again you get a negative review I would ask for a follow up you know thirty days from now I would say.
Pool eat a month for now and and see where we are because you want that opportunity.
For your boss to be able to say yeah I you know I have I've heard some great things and that -- this is clear that these.
These are key tips -- Were all of our employees -- almost being judged by me the -- employer.
If we don't follow through and show yet -- sent all these things to me now I have to make good on my end.
And show you that we're on the great employee -- doing -- death rate and you -- get feedback directly from your -- -- just remember you're also working with colleagues -- vendors to consult with people inside and outside your department and that feedback matters to.
So to the extent that you get a great job growth thanks so much for your help on this see those -- -- and bring them to your next -- -- I'm still glad that you said that.
-- needed -- touches of a personal level for me but.
East and you're always a good employee -- say no it's just another -- They got a positive review because I you know I work really hard and I -- but you should save them because.
When it comes time for that motion that salary increase that's the -- proof that -- this person.
Right unsolicited positive.
Compliment -- and remember your boss might not know everything you're working on because you took on all of these projects it's a great way to tell -- -- -- from manager as the Boston it's almost expected that -- she doesn't know all the things that we're doing.
Because -- they did when he -- right exactly and then if they hear one bad thing from when a colleague -- all of these other.
Great job emails yeah and that definitely turns the tide.
Yet they sometimes Caroline from -- -- career coaching co-founder of six figures start danger is always for coming on on Tuesdays.
Recently reared by spare -- out there Irina had to break right now welcome back at this doctor woody.
And Astoria on an issue.
Not only blame.
Something we shouldn't worry about the cyber bullying has taken on -- -- proportions.
And now they're cracking down on what they have coming up.
Welcome back so we live in a fast paced world for staying focused is nearly impossible because of the Blackberry again.
And the iPhone -- -- legs then you know dinner and I Anthony for the kids you name doctor Michael will be joining us once again.
On his career accelerated Tuesday -- -- some tips on.
How to try to.
Best stay focused his decision that we once.
It as you mentioned it's tough we're constantly being barraged by all kinds of stuff -- see you mention whether it's.
Your Blackberry or iPhone.
Being online and the phone ringing being at work trying to just get to work traffic whatever it -- right.
And so it's not hard to get sidetracked.
From making good decisions and and -- -- so it was more about the snipes had a great conversation with Harvard professor -- to -- -- who actually studies this and sort of book called sidetracked.
It was it is a good show identified in the three major buckets of things that tend to sidetrack us from.
This things that we intend to do those schools were trying to go after yet but for some reason we keep kind of dig it -- agony not to enact yet we all have.
And she she puts it into three categories she's that there are three types of forces that act -- us.
Does it come from within us compact system as we can be our own worst enemy that -- from relationships and then of course those that come from the outside of itself.
From -- within part and I say this all the time and you know this role victims of living in our own heads and that's how we are.
-- doesn't have to pay attention to emotional state.
So in other words you go into a negotiation.
Whether it's -- salary.
You know exactly what you want -- contingencies how to respond or react to offers.
But you now prepared for how you might emotionally react or your state of mind and how that's -- impact you.
Well as -- people go -- with the best of intentions in the case.
Right dividend that Regis Caver you BC you have a script in your head and then eating get what you expected.
From the person expressing your script to and it can't speculate that god is not out yet you throw it out because all of a sudden something -- -- it could be feared.
It could be concerned.
Whatever it and it actually asked right or you can even you have taken a step further so it's important to be mindful of that and -- you know I -- preaches -- to be present.
Make sure you clear your mind the -- Being a good place before you go and in negotiation have a conversation.
So that you make a good decision and keep yourself in check pay attention.
Are my emotions coming up it's so then put yourself not taken for rationality -- here rationality should rain but it doesn't always have the got.
Guilty as charged is actually planning our action on relationships that athletic events are relationships -- excellent right that's another -- challenge and there's a phenomenon in my role of psychology we call social comparison.
It's essentially this idea of keeping up with the joneses and Obama and -- fresh fear of missing -- yeah.
It's true and so what happens sometimes save your hiring manager you want to hire that this great -- -- you start to look at and you think you know.
Consume a lot like me.
And that may be good but also to start to get a little competitive.
May it may be be too much liking you start looking at some of their negative attributes instead of focusing on what they bring to the table so it's very easy for -- start.
Over comparing ourselves in getting to comparative.
And then start to think you know.
It made you focus too much on the negative and you gotta remember step back what are my trying to get I'm trying to get some of his good hopefully even better than me.
It's okay to feel a little threatened would pay attention that don't let it seep into.
-- decision making.
It can happen -- doesn't -- -- dust and then that the last -- was forces from the outside these airlines can't tell -- he's writes.
And it's important to pay attention not just for you.
But when you're evaluating her looking at -- -- to say you're the boss and you're thinking about two people you want -- promote.
When it comes from the smaller region is pretty easy to manage -- they have great numbers and not a person comes from -- tougher region.
Not so easy to manage that -- have the greatest numbers but they have probably been beating the odds Lotta times we may just go with the better numbers.
But in fact -- take into account context.
So all those outside forces like.
Environmental factors maybe impacting how that person performs in the got to think you're maybe they're beating the odds maybe their numbers are great but there like.
Really -- it and if they would have been another.
Context or circumstance.
So some of -- to pay attention that we can minimize contacts.
And just -- one simple facts to make decisions so pull back.
Make sure you taking into account all the information -- To stay on course anxiety -- talking about all of this in your article which we're gonna put on -- -- right now not the switch gears talk about something that's trending on.
Right now on this is the story of the day and dribbling website is called bully bill dot com.
Think it's -- terrifying cyber bullies.
And -- forming.
Thinking about -- planning this has been done yet those -- bosses because how you left in your private life reflects upon your player.
Absolutely I love this and they -- -- form some bosses so.
You have what are out -- yes they have to -- other upper class and in many of these instances not yet.
At least -- heard -- I just read this morning so what I'll tell you this is fascinating and I don't know how many times I've said it -- -- -- continue to say it probably for years to come back.
I don't care what your opinions and privacy are if you say it in cyberspace.
It will just there wherever -- will be on the house someone someone can get it and so you have to be so careful.
What they -- here is you know it's in reaction does some people bullying -- Gaza not enough she's the most sympathetic character out there.
But they're making a good point in that if you're gonna start making threats to people's lives.
Making physical threats you know what judging other people you let what I Rihanna and a perfect example you might not think that she deserves the -- that she's getting to your reality star.
-- skill set talents -- she is where she -- and a lesson we have to be.
Nice to -- are particularly in a public space that is social media -- and what happens here is.
Is some people say it's very tricky -- though the whole notion of is it my own account on my own time you know my own kind of megaphone my outlets of the world -- is doing -- that work.
But what -- well ahead of status.
In some of these cases they were doing it from work counts and you're doing it from work all your time forget all -- -- He probably was oh it's just where are -- my boss doesn't know that I have this account why would they care even if they did because it's I don't have my real name registered or whatever right.
And -- that's an excellent point it is our personal accounts so we should.
May be technically be able to say whatever we want Tuesday.
Why would you want to -- names and why would you want other people to be able to see the meaning that you didn't say well here's the -- you know and he says he's.
Lawyer but as an employer I can see -- -- if it's out there I can see it I can find it.
And if I find out that you're -- stuff and acting in ways that are counter to the culture of our company counter to the values that we spouse.
Then am wondering did you misrepresent yourself to me.
Are you a different person and work when you're out in the world and what does that say about who you are right and how you represent yourself to my clients and -- our customers and our company.
He would worry me a lot and in certain -- -- I think they have the right salutes them.
-- and and the ability to chime in and eighteen cents out there is getting easier and easier we're talking about this rumor that FaceBook phone.
Updating you marry him personally that as we constantly throughout the day -- un.
Absorbed its FaceBook phones and -- -- easy to do that.
Every time the home month on the kids need different example of sun newspaper article that she read.
About selling -- saying something on FaceBook that they shouldn't set out this awful repercussions -- happening library to major job loss or divorce.
And it's funny how is Hillary only censored -- and we can't be careful.
Be rational be realistic he'd light.
-- people me Manger.
And now well you're player -- -- -- fight out this is just one site bully bill.
Yeah you know more happy on the way -- and their audit to the Blue Devils skated I mean they're making a statement here.
Without -- unbelievable well that's on foxnews.com if you want to read more about that -- -- website.
Big -- 323 I never have to -- what I say in cyberspace.
Staying out there I just have to say the wrong thing to my wife and it never goes away well let me -- -- he's training the right way I -- I think that that's it thank you doctor mightily coming on once again.
Jerry west side of -- -- now heading to a -- back after this with Paula delay.
Cannot ignore who has some sure fire -- -- it just prevents failure battling out to make it happen whether it back.
It's career accelerator to today that's -- think their staffers.
Jumping the gun on warrants in an Eddie our next guest joins us from San Francisco we have mr.
-- to -- The founder Pacific real -- an entrepreneur -- -- successful businessman also know a motivational speaker and you say.
Call that it's impossible.
-- possible to -- four in America why is that.
-- how -- and all you -- -- off.
I'm doing great -- impossible before -- -- -- -- -- ten -- as opposed an American.
You know I now live around the -- I was born in Africa -- -- camel and Newport country.
I went to school in England and then I I lived in Asia Taiwan.
And -- his story -- -- Yet after ten years in America I think it's impossible to be -- in America.
And people challenge that but I think I really want team's quiet down and say that we my -- it's in very short book.
There's -- -- fifty pages and if you are not making more than we -- -- -- thousand dollars a year in America and I can show you how.
To make an amount of money given in three months.
It's I think your critics in -- they don't have you or your story.
You came from an unfortunate.
Beginning in the country that you relating your educated yourself -- -- seen so many things other people don't have that vision and you do and that's why you have five.
Sure fire ways to prevent -- and obviously with preventing failure.
Making it essentially impossible -- -- state TV to be part what are some of those ways you stay here shortsighted -- that the big problem.
Yes exactly see if you are short siding roof or didn't -- -- -- up leaving about you know of the future you go think about yourself.
And I think about us.
OK governor might just society -- nothing about your neighborhood guess what is happening -- gigabyte is south bulimia had to mop.
There was happening is that you -- bound to fail because you don't have a -- -- You see in my I lived and the Bay Area -- -- Google FaceBook Yahoo! you.
Don't Twitter at all this company's -- -- about -- eBay how can you not being.
Inspirational hacking and I have a vision to be like this people they got two eyes one knew -- one had just like the rest of us.
And so it's I'm so inspired to be here and I act I think it be that its big -- -- the Bay Area and -- -- be area.
And you -- -- -- -- companies guess what them I think -- deceptively so you've got to start with a vision to do their best event.
That the president of arrest of life's gonna have a big -- my lack of of Asian people as you've not -- -- -- what you're about to fail but I.
Think they can still a big think big or go home -- Exactly that's already as you know you so much stuff was would have been doing what you want right to be in the -- what -- -- -- life.
What -- for your children your grandchildren I inspired by you and you're certainly motivational speaker for me can you talk a little bit about your story because you did.
Start a company right Pacific realty partners.
Yes yes -- -- -- that it does.
Very relative flatness in 20072007.
When they -- was going down.
That's when asked -- it.
Right so basically and doubt when apple was -- I what's about to throw in the towel because I will implement -- I -- did you without it -- I did not make any money.
-- -- of Americans have backed Asia wecht you want you know at least prior to be moved to America.
You know but -- less tired at that company because -- -- that the partners about when the going gets stopped the top that don't.
So I saw that I -- why those people for closing on the poppies what those -- and properties.
Been enlisted Boca I thought okay cool if you can't beat them join them the banks were the ones reporting on properties at a time.
So I started that company and asked -- it do what it caught -- -- broker price opinions for that banks.
And -- why don't realize -- 2009.
You know I was our other top of the local four I -- mortgage in the entire northern California.
Ticket when the -- -- -- -- from -- go on and now what companies want to -- is going companies -- -- -- -- area.
I had a vision -- My company had a vision for my life so because of that I was able to weaves them all of this is to teach.
-- -- -- All they did not mean -- bad economy I know what happened between 2000 even 2010.
But today west so vibrant I have been -- -- would mean you want to be exclusive to meet in Dubai properties you're in -- -- and across the country.
So -- a visual part and you know.
But you gotta be the tournament you have to have a determination.
-- -- -- I have a vision they cannot determine right there you gonna fail.
You gotta have the discipline he got to be solid this plane you know the kids I mean the president things I have to -- goal I have to sacrifice to get to where wanna be.
Because my vision I have to be sold laser focus on my region that is what I wanna be.
Out of what they have some distractions out along the way -- I am not gonna give -- People give up so easily and that was all white people like Michael Jordan or Kobe Bryant -- play basketball and replaced with -- You know within that or hitting just let -- of -- cut -- that no.
That -- -- that discipline and because of that thing becomes second nature of that.
And you see someone that.
What do you mean -- by instability.
Instability -- but exactly instantly these people people.
You know if you find someone I have from agents and my company you know who just stayed -- Did you think OK Paul is a hot shot right now to what happened -- that -- join a company.
-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- It almost.
Then I determine to what will happen is that they just jump from one company to another so if someone is out there.
Yet that seems to regulate it for example in most countries in a while I mean.
It then what countries what you see the countries in Africa now quoted -- all the time this is -- because of new delivery you have Melia.
Same thing for the individual event -- -- -- in your life -- not -- -- you've got discipline you're bound to fail.
-- on the fear is as simple as that.
But America is such a great country that I mean provides all the infrastructure that you know I mean if you feel he had -- you have deceptively.
That's the big differences between people who live in some other countries particularly those developing countries in this Third World nations and people that live here life is a luxury.
And some of those other places and people here take life for granted.
And that must bother you a little bit because we don't realize Americans don't realize all of the opportunities are right there.
-- we just would actually go and try to get them.
So in my book actually be approved it to my book I talk -- in Palm -- -- -- America I think it basically how you have.
400 and and did you billionaires.
In America out of twelfth on that bill and as an MRI and while -- -- Almost half of those in America.
-- half of those have already pledged to give 50% off they'll walk to the general public.
Today Americans and is that what you're going into the body collection -- what do you do an about -- I end up money -- just about.
-- three months ago let that FaceBook founder.
Gave half a billion dollars to a charity.
Right has hit when people get to that stage and -- like Warren Buffett and ambient gates bill I think if money back to -- site.
That's all that all Americans have to do is have built themselves -- with that amount money.
We got a ton of foundations in America you have a ton of.
DC company's venture venture capitalist you have a lot of Angel investors.
You know people like this wanna invest in you.
-- and I put up which you that there.
We have to -- it -- thank you so much.
I think you learn your -- say is on the screen.
Thanks a lot -- of course the Mark Zuckerberg Steve Jobs is -- -- Bill Gates of this world are those pristine examples in the polls that maybe none of us -- -- be able to achieve that there are a lot of good people doing good things successful things smaller scouts and while that's where -- -- -- -- at fallacy here tomorrow on small business.
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