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Valorie Burton says if you want a second chance, you can’t be afraid to own up to your failure
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Welcome back -- accelerator Tuesday okay Valerie bring joining us sign that another life could -- out -- -- we'll show them on the screen right now.
Successful women being different plane.
As well as your five minute personal Coach five minute policies everybody this and that there is at stake how are you about I'm doing great how are you right I'm good I'm good -- I think we all have that experience whether it's at a holiday party or.
Maybe a little office playing that we had whatever it is.
Where -- -- -- idea and can I ever get past this but the answer is we're all human and you can't yet know Clinton did.
That's very General Petraeus is working on it yeah you know Martha Stewart did it right right -- there's -- the list is really a lot of strip yeah.
Eleven happens to just a regular person giving me at a -- Out of it will you know it.
I gave you first and foremost you have to start with you I think for so many people when they make a big mistake -- have a failure maybe -- that really poor performance review and they're trying to figure out how to -- build from here.
They beat themselves on hand and the most resilient people really do think differently they actually say something different to themselves in the face of a failure so.
You know kissing my careers over I've never been overcome that we don't notice what we're saying to ourselves that you've got a signal -- Have made a mistake how can I come back you really have to talk to yourself in those terms that allow you.
To release are thinking about what really need to do differently and so and the foreign deposits -- the -- so it's kind of like well received for the past behind you that you need to address it.
Absolutely I mean you've got to be honest -- -- we think about some of the big scandals we think about the fact that people don't apologize -- don't acknowledge.
What they've done wrong.
All the credibility is gone the trust is gone so -- You mess up whatever that NASA looks like being willing to admit it.
Is really huge because a lot of times it's -- kind of that character flaw that got you into listen first yeah.
So if you're able to have good character by turning around and saying yes I was wrong.
That particular long way towards rebuilding C start with you you're not afraid to own up to your failure -- Use what you got yet in -- -- be unstoppable yes and yet so.
Being unstoppable -- having a vision where you going from here and I think a lot of people get stuck.
When they make a mistake for their career -- stalled so yes losing even that's a -- or something that happens for a reason and it's because it's pushing you -- -- new direction.
So you can think big -- do you really want to -- -- -- so many people downsize their dreams and sometimes -- really bad stuff that -- actually when -- and the need to -- in the right direction that I wouldn't have -- -- -- -- whatever -- there.
Yeah that's a good way of up.
Of -- -- sorry definitely have to in that optimism is a huge part of that and the people who make it to the top.
Are the most optimistic -- that's right at my research that -- I I -- I have to challenge you on this front I feel like that people.
-- I know who made it to the top.
Are always there -- the ones who worked really hard and they doubt themselves as well as their abilities which means stable and Carter.
Who would you it made him or heard -- the actually believe that something biggest possible and that's why he worked so they had the hope.
That's right that's right you can't let go of the hope when you -- you don't work hard you know -- you're gonna make it.
Yeah well you know eight when you think of like a little kids ever wants to be -- Look at the president and doctors and lawyers.
And reality we're not all can become those banks there's so you can blame that actually do -- they sent out today you don't.
And that's sad it's sad it's sad yes and it's and it's not too late and that's -- sometimes when you have a major setback.
If you can look at it as a way to have a come back towards what you need and want and it's huge but it takes a lot of optimism and a lot of confidence to be able to do it.
How do you.
Get really something to that optimism confidence.
So you -- -- essentially think of optimism we -- debit in this sense I believe no matter what but the most resilient the most successful are optimistic.
Except when there's a big risk involved.
That's it may think you know what political little pessimism let me see what Michael -- like you create a plan B yes and that's I'm talking about around being unstoppable it's not that you don't get knocked down -- fifty get back up every right.
Right and they say here don't go it alone.
Okay so -- set having that.
A strong friend or partner -- side and the F financial safety and then all the safety net is -- -- -- Olsen.
You know your reputation is about.
Relationships is about what people are saying so if you've got those influences around -- that they've they've had enough experience with you that they still believe that you.
Those are the people -- to help you to rebuild and you can't do it by yourself it's all about relationships.
For the better your relationships before you make a mistake.
The more likely it is that -- gonna have a successful comeback and we think about -- talking nettleton scandals of the first things.
That I noticed with the scandal with General Petraeus is how many people -- those they acknowledged what he did was wrong how many people came forward and talked about.
What -- -- an amazing job he's done wanna good leader he's dead and so when you've got people who had other experiences with you.
When there's something negative that happens they're able to put -- in a bigger perspective right.
And what.
Are -- rightful place that essentially what General Petraeus did.
Didn't really affect his ability to leave it just tarnish his reputation tarnished I mean of course we're looking at what information -- -- hand at what time but essentially.
-- hitting it when you look at -- but we just talked about owning up to you failure with one of the first things he he said I'll let myself down analyst my family to I was wrong.
And I resign I'm not fighting us.
And that's huge and -- who would you say resigning was the right -- Well I think based on if he had read this book recently he says his values are getting lined up a good what he says his values are -- me that wasn't a big surprise that he did that.
Right now and what happens now for him here and you know I don't think it's the end I think you know -- we think he's what you've got.
When he uses those strengths eventually.
Will come back I think -- his first priority right now rightly so is his handling trying to rebuild.
And -- Alan I'm -- he's another one of those heroes fallen from grace.
That's really good point that that the differences he seems to have insisted on I haven't done anything wrong he -- He's constantly not.
Not ending -- in when he owns up I think people will be willing to say okay.
He's kind of coming to himself he's reflecting.
Maybe we can listen to begin -- -- to blown up people away anymore.
And some Chris service phonics reading and saying his main problem is marketing himself yeah.
How do you market yourself.
A couple ways -- one you need to be really good at what you -- could present it marketing haven't read tapestry that's driving you can market market market but it if what you're offering -- -- dead people are gonna talk about it right so doing a great job is what gets people talking.
But also people who speak up a meal I think a lot of times people don't talk about their wins -- -- celebrate their win.
The other aspect of marketing goes back to relationships.
Are you building relationships not only with your co workers.
But with his mentors who can give you good advice along the way.
And I'm finding out with the people who the most successful have been doing and -- sometimes that's what gives you the wisdom about the steps to taking your own career.
Excellent point -- -- thank you so much for coming on us for your website on our screen.
And I break dot com great pick -- extra.
People being -- -- after I had named sun -- chatting and on this Tuesday career in accelerator day of -- -- in -- --
